SILAS JONATHAN SILAS U13MM1133
FIVE WAYS TO RELATE WITH PEOPLE BETTER
As we go through with our daily lifes, we meet with alot of people, people with different attitude, characters, behaviour and believes. Hence, life begins to be a Mary go round when we do not seem to understand who they are, what they want or even how to treat them. This piece( though may lack universal application) will greatly help you in how you relate with people, as i outlist five ways that has helped me greatly.
#1 ALWAYS THINK FROM THE OTHER PERSONS PERSPECTIVE:
So many times we get into arguments with other people, and at the end they say things like: " you don't seem to understand" and shut us down regarding us as shallow. However, our aim is to try and see things from the other persons lenses. Think for a moment, what if am in his/her shoes, what are the possible steps i would have taken? Think of the possible situations surrounding that person and see how you could help. MARTIN LUTHER KING JNR. said: I donot judge people base on my principles, but by their own principles. When we try to view things from the other persons point of view, they see us as caring, empathetic and considerate. You don't know what others go through, until you walk their walk.
#2 IDENTIFY A GAP IN PEOPLES LIFE, THEN FILL IT:
When getting to know people, try hard to be frugal with your money, time and attention. Try hard with utmost concentration to identify a need in them, then kick start on how to fill such a gap. Always have a goal you want to achieve with people and when you achieve it, maintain it. If its attention, try hard to give your undivided attention to that person, if its financial help try to render help base on your ability, if its your time, give it freely. When doing this, donot mind what you will get, but what you want them to get from you. The thing is, we always go into relationships with people with a capitalist mindset; what we want to get, and that's where the problems starts. Lets learn to fill a void, not create one.
#3 BE INTENTIONAL NOT EMOTIONAL:
So many times we let our emotions encloud our decisions, actions, and even behaviours. The thing is, we most be aware of the power of emotions and learn to deal with it greatly. Thus, the only we can do that is by being intentional. Because at some point in our lifes we are going to come across people who will negate us, resent us and even contradict us publicly,the only way to deal with such kind of people is to be intentional about fighting the default emotion that may surface, which may be anger, hatred or even misunderstanding. By being more empathetic, friendly and even silent at times toward them. will put them off balance and confused about your next move.
#4 DIG DEEP BEHIND THE "FINE":
It's been said that behind every "fine" spoken by a person, is a million tale. Your aim is to uncover the tale behind the fine and really listen with great empathy. It has become a cliche this days to respond to greetings by just saying fine. People just say " fine" when all is not well. Its not there fault that they donot wish to say what disturbs them, its not yours either. The fact is, the world has turn into a selfish centre piece where people only care about themselves, thus this has taught people to rather bottle up their deepest issues. Thus, your aim here is to find out the tale behind the FINE and listen attentively, just listen!!
5# CONQUER FAMILIARITY:
Its been said that familiarity brings contempt. Naturally the more we get to know people, get use to them, decipher them, familiar with them, the more we seem to disrespect them,disregard them, downgrade and take them for granted. Its not our fault, its just the human nature. However, since we are now aware of the familiarity syndrome, we should learn to do away with it. Making it intentional to regard people, the more we are getting to know them. So when familiarity comes in, we still maintain our place with them. Notice this, when we are getting to know people we usually start with good gesture like:" Good morning" as time goes on it becomes "how fa" as days go by, it becomes "hey" then nothing at all. All this happens due to familiarity, that is why people are scared to be free with us or with one another because they fear familiarity, which may make their value go low. But you are different, so be intentional about respecting and regarding people the more you getting to know them.
though this tips may not be generally applicable, it will at least help us in some other ways. Its been said, the more you learn, the more you earn. So learning is continues!
FIVE WAYS TO RELATE WITH PEOPLE BETTER
As we go through with our daily lifes, we meet with alot of people, people with different attitude, characters, behaviour and believes. Hence, life begins to be a Mary go round when we do not seem to understand who they are, what they want or even how to treat them. This piece( though may lack universal application) will greatly help you in how you relate with people, as i outlist five ways that has helped me greatly.
#1 ALWAYS THINK FROM THE OTHER PERSONS PERSPECTIVE:
So many times we get into arguments with other people, and at the end they say things like: " you don't seem to understand" and shut us down regarding us as shallow. However, our aim is to try and see things from the other persons lenses. Think for a moment, what if am in his/her shoes, what are the possible steps i would have taken? Think of the possible situations surrounding that person and see how you could help. MARTIN LUTHER KING JNR. said: I donot judge people base on my principles, but by their own principles. When we try to view things from the other persons point of view, they see us as caring, empathetic and considerate. You don't know what others go through, until you walk their walk.
#2 IDENTIFY A GAP IN PEOPLES LIFE, THEN FILL IT:
When getting to know people, try hard to be frugal with your money, time and attention. Try hard with utmost concentration to identify a need in them, then kick start on how to fill such a gap. Always have a goal you want to achieve with people and when you achieve it, maintain it. If its attention, try hard to give your undivided attention to that person, if its financial help try to render help base on your ability, if its your time, give it freely. When doing this, donot mind what you will get, but what you want them to get from you. The thing is, we always go into relationships with people with a capitalist mindset; what we want to get, and that's where the problems starts. Lets learn to fill a void, not create one.
#3 BE INTENTIONAL NOT EMOTIONAL:
So many times we let our emotions encloud our decisions, actions, and even behaviours. The thing is, we most be aware of the power of emotions and learn to deal with it greatly. Thus, the only we can do that is by being intentional. Because at some point in our lifes we are going to come across people who will negate us, resent us and even contradict us publicly,the only way to deal with such kind of people is to be intentional about fighting the default emotion that may surface, which may be anger, hatred or even misunderstanding. By being more empathetic, friendly and even silent at times toward them. will put them off balance and confused about your next move.
#4 DIG DEEP BEHIND THE "FINE":
It's been said that behind every "fine" spoken by a person, is a million tale. Your aim is to uncover the tale behind the fine and really listen with great empathy. It has become a cliche this days to respond to greetings by just saying fine. People just say " fine" when all is not well. Its not there fault that they donot wish to say what disturbs them, its not yours either. The fact is, the world has turn into a selfish centre piece where people only care about themselves, thus this has taught people to rather bottle up their deepest issues. Thus, your aim here is to find out the tale behind the FINE and listen attentively, just listen!!
5# CONQUER FAMILIARITY:
Its been said that familiarity brings contempt. Naturally the more we get to know people, get use to them, decipher them, familiar with them, the more we seem to disrespect them,disregard them, downgrade and take them for granted. Its not our fault, its just the human nature. However, since we are now aware of the familiarity syndrome, we should learn to do away with it. Making it intentional to regard people, the more we are getting to know them. So when familiarity comes in, we still maintain our place with them. Notice this, when we are getting to know people we usually start with good gesture like:" Good morning" as time goes on it becomes "how fa" as days go by, it becomes "hey" then nothing at all. All this happens due to familiarity, that is why people are scared to be free with us or with one another because they fear familiarity, which may make their value go low. But you are different, so be intentional about respecting and regarding people the more you getting to know them.
though this tips may not be generally applicable, it will at least help us in some other ways. Its been said, the more you learn, the more you earn. So learning is continues!
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